The Year was 1995. “My So Called Life” told the story of (my) teen angst. Crop tops and combat boots were in fashion, and AOL was the largest online service provider. It was also the year that my sister spent 45 days in ICU with a rare neurological illness, and I learned about the brutal nature of the Home Owners Association (HOA). 

When my parents built their dream home in the “rural” suburbs of Fort Worth, Texas, they did not know that within a year of moving in, their oldest daughter would be diagnosed with Guillain–Barré syndrome.  Within 24 hours of walking into the hospital, my sister was paralyzed and on life support, where she would remain for over 6 weeks.  It took months of physical rehabilitation to allow her to return home and during her recovery, my parents rarely left her side.  During her recovery was when the HOA of their “dream” community decided to notify them that their lawn was overgrown.  

In keeping with the standards of the community we did what any fine, southern family would do.  We took care of the yard and hung a 10-foot passive-aggressive printed banner between the front oak trees.  

“Welcome Home Melissa After 45 Days In ICU!”

With disdain for HOAs cemented in my teen psyche (what happened to talking to your neighbors or lending a hand), I went off to college. I married a man whose job moved us around the country for 20+ years and now reside in a community that could arguably take the prize for “Worst Homeowners Association in the US.”

It started innocently enough.  A letter arrived with the return address of our HOA.  Assuming it was an update on the upcoming pool pass distribution, I eagerly ripped the letter open.  Much to my surprise, it was my first EVER HOA violation notice.  

Mortified, I wondered what we had done to bring down the wrath of the Covenant Board.  

“Chipped Mailbox Paint“.  Yes, upon inspection, the paint around the bottom of the post was chipped.  Likely damage from the HOA contracted lawn service, but it was easy enough to paint and proceed with our peaceful HOA existence until…

“Front Lamppost Not Operational.” While out of town to visit family, following the death of my aunt, a light bulb burned out. Again, easy enough to fix, but the timing struck a nerve.

Notices 3, 4 and 5 shortly followed for tree trimming, vegetation in gutters and leaves in the yard.

Our home backs up to a forest and after our third leaf raking session followed by a major winter wind storm, I decided “leaves happen.”  I was tempted to argue that the bulk of the leaves were in the street and therefore on communal property, but I was a good neighbor and bagged leaves a fourth time.

While nitpicky and time consuming, the infractions were documented by the HOA Board with photos and “noncompliance reference numbers”, so there was little more to do than comply and complain to my Facebook friends until… 

Covid-19 virtually shut down our state overnight and the Board sent THIS email. 

In the moment when our HOA should have encouraged neighbors to look after each other and find ways to support each other, they chose to utilize the opportunity to remind us that the “Inspector” would be checking up on our exterior endeavors.  The “character” of our current HOA is defined not by the effort to uphold standards, but by the reminder that when global pandemic strikes and you are put under Stay at Home orders by your governor, it’s a great time to “keep up appearances”.  

 When we care more about outward presentation than the lives and livelihoods within those exteriors, we lose sight of what matters – being a neighborhood that people want to call home.  

If we could go back in time, I wish we would have known about the HOA situation prior to signing a lease. It may have given us reason to walk away. Then again, it may have just been a cautionary tale.  One thing I do know, though, the next tenants will have fair warning when they read my review on RentalDiaries.com.  

Before you rent a home, ask for a copy of the HOA Guidelines and Standards. They are NOT all the same. 

• Garage shall not be used as living space. 
• Window coverings must be of a conventional variety, neutral in color, including curtains, drapes, shutters or blinds.
• No livestock, chickens or goats shall be kept on the property. 
• Trash receptacles may not be put on the curbside prior to dusk the night before scheduled pickup.
• December holiday décor must be removed by 5 Jan.

While it’s good to know your suburban sleep will not be interrupted by the rooster crowing, trash can placement may be an issue and if you intend to follow Taylor Swift’s example and “make the rules”, you don’t want to be surprised by a violation notice in your mailbox on 6 January. 

When signing a lease, pay attention to the clauses regarding exterior maintenance and HOA compliance responsibilities.  Typically, renters are responsible for annual mulching and maintaining grass and flower beds. Trees, shrubbery and gutter responsibility may vary by lease

After recovering from the shock of our first HOA violation, my thoughts immediately jumped to “what will our homeowner think?!”  I quickly sent him a text to let him know the situation and asked if he would like me to handle it.  (Again, reading the lease assured me that it was his responsibility, but good will and all.)  Because we were transparent and offered to help when we felt capable of handling the job, when the 6th notice came, our homeowner laughed, ripped up his copy of the letter and vowed to paint the offending shutters when he received a second violation. 

While we have developed a bond with our homeowner over our mutual loathing of the HOA, make no mistake, he is the homeowner and we are the tenants who want their security deposit back when we move. When communicating with a homeowner about HOA violations (or any issue with the home in general), always follow up phone calls with an email or text to create a “paper trail“. Keep it cordial. Keep it civil. Keep it clean to be read in front of a judge, jury or arbitrator should the need arise. 

And if you are wondering about our current shutter situation, neither our home owner nor I have painted them, but here is my photo for documentation.